One of the criticisms of Gospel preaching is that it can, at times, be gloomy. “Do we have to hear about sin again?”, the complaint goes, “Do you have to be so down on humanity?”, “Can’t we talk about how great life is sometimes?”, “Can’t you give me some self-improvement tools?”
To these voices the Gospel preacher replies that life is often (perhaps mostly) hard, and that as much as we might crave a word of optimism, a little fuel for the part of us that longs to live in blissful ignorance (or denial), what we really need is not to have our humanity built up, but rather put to death. True hope – hope in God and his unbreakable love for us in Jesus Christ – comes only when we let go of our false hopes, and this happens only in the crucible of real, hard, life. In this view, church ceases to be a venue for fairy tales and bedtime stories, but rather a haven for sufferers. Church is the place where we come together to hear and tell the truth about our lives, our sin, and to receive grace and mercy. As Martin Luther poignantly once wrote, “If the mercy is true, you must therefore bear a true, not an imaginary sin. God does not save those who are only imaginary sinners.”
Secondarily, we might also say that there is tremendous comfort in knowing that we are not alone in our suffering. Although our “better selves” may crave an environment of collective positivity, our real selves need fellow sufferers. Counterintuitively, we find a community of truth-telling to be a balm, not a depressant, in the midst of our own trials. Just check out your local 12-step meeting sometime.
Along these lines, there was a very interesting little piece on NPR this morning about a group in Verona, Italy which exists for the sole purpose of answering the over 6,000 letters written to Juliet every year. These letters are overwhelmingly sad; women (and some men) who have had their hearts broken, often repeatedly, and are reaching out to the love-struck suicidal teenager in search of some relief. While one might think that reading and responding to these letters would be the most depressing job imaginable, it is, in fact, quite the opposite:
Despite the heartbreak, many of the secretaries have been doing this for years — decades even. But the odd effect of witnessing so much loneliness, the secretaries explain, is that it actually makes them feel closer to humanity at large. “Seeing that so many people are sharing the same feeling,” says Marchi, “makes you a little less lonely.”
Amen.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=87cLyBR1JTo&w=600]
COMMENTS
10 responses to “From One Juliet to Another: Sufferers Comforting Sufferers”
Leave a Reply
So Good! It reminds me of what my friend Wesley Channell once said. “Churches are not to be Country Clubs for Saints but rather a Hospice for sinners…” A Place where we can come, die and together find comfort… I’m going to miss you next week the M-Bird!
Yes….great stuff. I wish I had insight and practical teaching like this during some of those “die to self” Bible studies in college. 28 years later, I feel like I’m just beginning to get a handle on it.
I know exactly what you mean! Nothing worse then a bunch of kids (of which I was one) sitting around talking about we wanted God to “really break us” or how we really had to make the effort to “take up our cross,” having no idea that God was already doing all of that to us, and in the places & moments we least expected…
Another wonderful, post, RJ! Especially poignant during a month when that play has randomly gotten some flack on the web:
http://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2013/04/in-defense-of-i-romeo-and-juliet-i-its-not-childish-its-about-childishness/274836/
I love this post, RJ. Isn’t it awesome that the best “self-improvement tools” involve neither self nor tools? Just the grace of God dancing with the sinners, shaking all the falsehoods away…
beautifully put
I have been away from M-bird for awhile but here I am back at your message of Grace! What a wonderful post. And I am right in the mix with the folks who commented. I really have no one who “talks” this language around me. It is all victorious faith and dying to self and only in my 60’s did the Gospel of grace finally begin to pierce this twisted thinking. I relate. Thanks M-bird.
Mary – Thanks for your comment! Very encouraging. I find, in my ministry, it is most often the older folks (sorry to call you old, but I’m 37:) who “get” this. They’ve tried and failed at being discipline-oriented Christians and, if they’re gonna continue being Christians at all, they have to figure out another way to do it, a way that, as Paul Zahl would say, “deals with the data” of everyday life. So happy that you’ve found your way here and hope that find some camaraderie in your neck of the woods. Also, if you don’t already know about him, you may find Steve Brown’s books very helpful…
Love this point! (Side Note: Our family has watched the charming “Letters to Juliette” film very many times!) There’s a line in the movie that nicely states what you point to in your first paragraph. You mention how some voices blanch at the prospect of hearing about sin and humanness. The (wonderful) Vanessa Redgrave character says to her grandson, in response to his desire to avoid life’s “messy bits”: “Charlie,” she says, “life is in the ‘messy bits.'” Excellent post here.