Posts tagged "Marriage"
Murder Your Spouse and Other Practical Tips for a Happy Marriage
Books / Death / Film / Forgiveness / Grace in Practice / Relationships

Murder Your Spouse and Other Practical Tips for a Happy Marriage

by Michael Sansbury on Mar 28, 2013 • 2 Comments

“The word of the cross for marriage is the word of perpetual absolution. It is the word that forgives the existence of the other.”

Paul Zahl, Grace in Practice

In the next two weeks, I will be attending two weddings. Because I will merely be a guest at both weddings, I have no legitimate basis for insinuating myself into the toasting. There is thus no captive audience for my unsolicited advice, nor (unfortunately) is my advice ever solicited.

But marriage advice is readily available; it depends only on your attention span. A quick Google search will give you anywhere from “6 Scientific Tips…

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Cigarettes, Cupcakes, Narcissicism, and Sympathy: Reflections on Judd Apatow
America / Everyday / Film / Identity / Money / Psychology / Relationships

Cigarettes, Cupcakes, Narcissicism, and Sympathy: Reflections on Judd Apatow

by David Zahl on Feb 18, 2013 • 4 Comments

Yes, the Oscars are just around the corner and yes, there are still a bunch of nominated films I haven’t seen either. Amour and Lincoln and Django are at the top of the list (at least I caught the hilarious and bloody “Djesus Uncrossed” this morning!), though I have no idea how they’d possibly surpass Silver Linings Playbook in terms of grace and intelligence and entertainment value. Suffice it to say, it was a good year for cinema. One film that’s stuck with me that hasn’t been mentioned with the rest of the pack is Judd Apatow’s This Is 40.…

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Five Golden…Themes! What We Just Couldn’t Get Enough of in 2012
America / Everyday / Film / Identity / Music / News / Politics / Psychology / Relationships / Sports / Technology / Theology / TV

Five Golden…Themes! What We Just Couldn’t Get Enough of in 2012

by Ethan Richardson on Dec 14, 2012 • 4 Comments

One of Mockingbird’s most distinctive features is the repetition. Like Christmas itself, we’re trying to point that one “old, old story,” that ancient theme, as we see it dug up time and again. It’s dug up in all sorts of places, of course, from 18th century poetry archives to slasher films, from church basements to top-tier corporate office towers. But it’s still resonating a singular focus–the Gospel–from these unforeseen, albeit obscure, sources.

Despite the wide-spanning scopes and intentions of some of our favorite “news” sources, the same thing unwittingly tends to happen. After all, reporting the news means telling and retelling…

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The Blessed Union of Two Dead Singletons
America / Death / Film / Identity / Relationships

The Blessed Union of Two Dead Singletons

by Ethan Richardson on Nov 29, 2012 • 7 Comments

One of the recent trending articles over at The Atlantic’s website is one entitled, “Single People Should Get to Have Weddings Too.” It’s not the first time they’ve talked explicitly about the singlehood issue. This time they claim that the “extraordinary rise of living alone” as “the biggest modern social change we’ve yet to identify,” describing its liberating appeal and the trenchant cultural norms standing in its way. Adult lives, Millie Kerr writes, are judged on benchmarks beyond singlehood—marriage, babies, homebuying—which means single people don’t get celebrated. She asks, “When will barometers of celebration reflect the growing number of singletons?”

I…

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Husbands, Love Your Wives… S’il Vous Plait
Film / Gender / Relationships / Suffering

Husbands, Love Your Wives… S’il Vous Plait

by Matt Schneider on Sep 21, 2012 • 2 Comments

Ephesians chapter 5, especially beginning at the 22nd verse has been popping up in my life lately almost on a daily basis for different reasons. As a result I keep thinking about the short film “Bastille” from an anthology of films called Paris, Je T’aime (Paris, I Love You), which my wife and I saw at an independent theatre several years ago. I find this short film to be a very “French” exposition of what self-sacrificial love might look like for a husband attempting to love his wife “as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that…

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No Man (Woman, Child) Is An Island…
Books / Film / Literature / Relationships / Social Science / Theology/Religion / TV

No Man (Woman, Child) Is An Island…

by Jeff Hual on Jun 6, 2012 • 1 Comment

If you’ve seen Hemingway and Gellhorn, HBO’s most recent throw-as-much-money-as-you-can-at-it-and-see-what-happens attempt at a small screen blockbuster, I have no doubt you feel strongly about the movie. Unfortunately for HBO, the majority feel strongly that the movie stinks.

I’m a lifelong and devoted Hemingway fan. I’ve always been fascinated with (read “envied”) his larger than life persona…not the drinking and womanizing, per se, but the fishing and hunting and living life to the fullest–and then being able to write about these manly pursuits like a man would want to be able to write about them…well, that’s Hemingway.

What struck me from the film isn’t…

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Another Week Ends: Willy Loman Preaches, Complicated Mourning, Extroversion Mandates, Celebrity Marriage Formulas, Dependency Dilemmas, Kontiki, Mad Men and Rowan Williams
America / Celebrity / Children / Church / Conferences / Death / Film / Humor / Identity / Law / Music / Relationships / Sermons / Social Science / TV / Week In Review

Another Week Ends: Willy Loman Preaches, Complicated Mourning, Extroversion Mandates, Celebrity Marriage Formulas, Dependency Dilemmas, Kontiki, Mad Men and Rowan Williams

by David Zahl on Mar 16, 2012 • No Comments

1. A little over four weeks until our Spring Conference in NYC (4/19-21), which means that on Monday night 3/19, the “Earlybird rates” will expire ($150/couple or $100/person all-inclusive). You can’t say we didn’t warn you… If you need an extra push, earlier this week the Episcopal News Service published a generous piece about Mockingbird, which describes our past conferences in flattering terms. So pre-register today! And speaking of our little organization, in the you-can’t-make-this-stuff-up department, a killer Mbird headline appeared in The NY Times recently that was just too uncanny not to share, “Nazareth Defeats Christ the King in…

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Book Review: The Meaning of Marriage by Tim Keller
Books / Relationships / Reviews / Theology

Book Review: The Meaning of Marriage by Tim Keller

by Bryan J. on Feb 16, 2012 • 3 Comments

Two things led me to pick up Tim Keller’s new book on marriage, both of which were pressing. The first: I needed a “marriage book” for Pastoral Care class at seminary. The second: I had an engagement ring burning a hole in my pocket, and it was gonna be there for another week before I could “unload it.” So you might say matrimony has been on my mind, for both academic and personal reasons. Seeing as I also happen to contribute on occasion to Mockingbird, the question quickly took on a larger scope: where does a grace-dependent Gospel junkie like me…

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Another Week Ends: Indie Law, The New Marriage Killer, Futurizing Fear, Apatheism, Damsels in Distress, George Lucas and Downton Abbey
America / Film / Grace in Practice / Law / Music / Psychology / Relationships / Religion / Social Science / Theology / TV / Week In Review

Another Week Ends: Indie Law, The New Marriage Killer, Futurizing Fear, Apatheism, Damsels in Distress, George Lucas and Downton Abbey

by David Zahl on Jan 27, 2012 • 3 Comments

1. In his short article “The Pitfalls of Indie Fame” on Grantland, Chuck Klosterman captures something we have been trying to say on here forever. Don’t be put off by all the music jargon; he is using the critical success of the tUnE-yArDs debut record as an opportunity to reflect on the cruelty of the Law. Which may be particularly pronounced in the indie world (or any rarified/snobby setting for that matter), but the phenomenon is universal. The human relationship to righteousness is a troubled one, love/hate at best, and it finds expression in every possible arena. And while non-religious…

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Another Week Ends: Generous Marriages, Creative Cheaters, Converted Grinches, Tebow Haters, Twilight Zone Xmases, Gracious Police and Walter
America / Books / Christmas / Forgiveness / Humor / Literature / Psychology / Relationships / Social Science / Sports / TV / Week In Review

Another Week Ends: Generous Marriages, Creative Cheaters, Converted Grinches, Tebow Haters, Twilight Zone Xmases, Gracious Police and Walter

by David Zahl on Dec 9, 2011 • 1 Comment

1. Some new research on the importance of generosity in marriage and relationships has been making the rounds this week, and the soundbites are amusing in their captain-obvious-ness. Generosity here being very close to what we would call grace, and the relational dynamic it characterizes being one that by and large does away with scorekeeping, exposing egalitarian notions of the 50-50 split as the recipe for resentment that they often are (100-100 being the happier and, ironically, less legalistic ideal). The research also implicitly condemns models of relating based on self-fulfillment rather than self-sacrifice. Go figure! Of course, knowing what’s…

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Suicidal Psychosis, Young Marriage and One-Way Love
Grace in Practice / Relationships

Suicidal Psychosis, Young Marriage and One-Way Love

by David Zahl on Nov 28, 2011 • 4 Comments

A beautiful entry to the NY Times’ Modern Love series appeared this past weekend, Mark Lukach’s brave “Out of Darkness,” which reflects on his wife’s unexpected and prolonged period of mental illness, and his default role as a caregiver during that time. For whatever reason, stories of husbandly love are pretty thin in the column itself, and some might say they are hard to find, period. Perhaps this is because men tend not to write about these things as much, or perhaps because the kind of nurturing being recounted here is (falsely) viewed as a purely feminine domain, I don’t…

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Kim Kardashian and the Burden of Ratings
Celebrity / Relationships / TV

Kim Kardashian and the Burden of Ratings

by Mockingbird on Nov 3, 2011 • 1 Comment

A timely little reflection from Mbird contributor Russ Masterson, prompted by last weekend’s conference:

I’m sure you’ve heard: 72 days after her high-profile wedding, reality TV star/professional celebrity Kim Kardashian is divorcing Kris Humphries. This after a much-publicized wedding which became a television frenzy, flooding their bank accounts with money and endorsements. I’ve read articles that estimate her earnings over the past few months at $10 million; others estimate $17 million. The number doesn’t really matter. The reality of one’s income being tied to a camera which follows you around is the point. Cameras and money come when ratings are good…

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Mockingbird at the Movies: Junebug
Church / Film / Relationships

Mockingbird at the Movies: Junebug

by Mockingbird on Aug 5, 2011 • 4 Comments

A reflection/review from Mbird friend Russ Masterson (with maybe a little help from DZ). If you haven’t grabbed Russ’ new e-book 40 Days Without Food, what’s stopping you?

While attending the Mockingbird Conference in NYC last spring, a fellow attendee rattled off all the under-the-radar movies he thought I should see. I remembered a few and added Junebug to my Netflix queue that night. A few months later the DVD arrived, only to be placed in our cabinet and forgotten for another month. Then, last weekend, we dusted it off and hit play.

The film begins with soft-spoken George (Alessandro Nivola) meeting…

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Another Week Ends: Divorce Delusions, FNL, KJV, Natural Family Planning, Pastafarianism, Harry Potter and 30 Rock
America / Bible / Film / Humor / Music / Psychology / Relationships / Religion / TV / Week In Review

Another Week Ends: Divorce Delusions, FNL, KJV, Natural Family Planning, Pastafarianism, Harry Potter and 30 Rock

by David Zahl on Jul 15, 2011 • No Comments

1. New Mbird favorite Heather Havrilesky hit another home run in this past Sunday’s NY Times Magazine with her column “The Divorce Delusion,” in which she exposed the current sunny pop-climate about divorce for what it is, namely, delusional. Or at least very naive. She also took the opportunity to muse on the underlying narcissism:

The moral to this modern divorce story? If everyone involved doesn’t emerge stronger, happier and more productive, well, then, in the vague parlance of today’s progressive preschool, someone is making bad choices.

The notion that there’s some “right” choice for every life challenge fits neatly into the…

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The Shifting Stigmas of Staying Together
America / Law / Relationships

The Shifting Stigmas of Staying Together

by David Zahl on Jun 21, 2011 • 2 Comments

A relevant little report in The NY Times about the declining rates of divorce among college-educated Americans. It would appear that the tide of social mores had gone out and now it’s come back in again. Or, rather, the law of social acceptability has shifted, as it always does, in content – but not severity. Specifically, in certain circles where divorce was once seen as a liberating event, it is now perceived as the opposite: a pitiful one. What’s interesting here is not whether or not this trend is a good thing (it probably is), but the way judgment functions…

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